Things Better Heard From The Horse's Mouth

Some of the stories you will likely hear are not true. But some of them are.  To wit:

1. My Cousin Jen (who, okay, isn't really my cousin, but it's a long story) picked me up at LaGuardia. I came around the corner to find her sitting in the waiting area near baggage claim, all by herself. She is easy to find. (it's the hair, people, the hair) I walked up behind her and said, "Jennifer!" and kissed her full on the mouth, totally freaking out the guy pushing the broom in the waiting area.  Which gave us oh, so much glee.

2. The next day, Jen and I were shopping together, and a man who was selling Jacob wool remarked on Jen's hair, telling her he found it very creative, and said, "But I shouldn't say that in front of your mom."  Totally freaking out ME.  (you could be a redneck if your cousin is also your mom?)

3. Rock Chick and I were jammin' together (ha, I flatter myself) and she gets a message on her voicemail. It was a police officer. She had mistakenly dialed 911 and there was an officer dispatched to the grounds to... protect her from me? ...who knows.  Could be from Cara. She was also there. I'd say the three of us could be a pretty dangerous and volatile mix, wouldn't you?  This could have been very funny. "Ma'am, what is your emergency?"  .............(fill in the blank. Make your own Mastercard commercial.) 

4. While hanging with Rock Chick, I called Dave to mess with his head a little bit. I told him that Rock Chick had stood me up and I was a little bit pissed. He was nicely outraged. "You should be A LOT pissed!  Did she give you any explanation?"  My response?  "I don't know; why don't you ask her," and handed the phone to RC.  I wait in fear of his next practical joke on me.

5. I was in the main barn.  My phone rang. The reception is next to nothing in there, and the call was lost. I went outside in a few minutes and pressed "send" to return the call.  The din was so loud and I am such a cellphonetard that I couldn't hear half of what the person said. It sounded to me like, "This is Joanie," or something that ended with "oanie."  I had absolutely NO idea what she was saying, and I was saying inane things back. It was telephone at its finest. The person said, "I'm in front of Building 5." (or something) I said, "Okay, I'll come up there. I'm wearing an orange t-shirt."  Then I wondered if this was somebody I was actually with that day, and wondered if they would think I had lost my mind by reminding them what I was wearing.  So I head up to this building with absolutely no clue who I was going to find. Who says I'm not adventurous?! Imagine my happiness when it turned out to be Jodi!  (Joanie, Jodi. Close.)  Then we went and sat outside and hung out together.  And got matching farmer's burns together. Well, except I don't have any ink.

6. I bought seven skeins of sock yarn. Yes. I really mean it. I of the "I Don't Knit Socks" club.  Wanna see?  I know you do......

Apparently I worry there will be a Trekking shortage. That's 2 skeins of 100, one of 105 (because I love the socks Cari made me of that colorway so much), and one of 110 because ohmanIlovethatcolorwaytoo!!!  And then there are two skeins of holycrapthat'sCormosockyarn!!  They tried to say it's fingering weight, but it's not. It's sportweight, at least. But I'm in Vermont. Sportweight (or heavier) socks are good.  I might dye this, or I might get some of my splendid dyeing pals (you know who you are) to dye it for me.  Incredibly beautiful, with 30% nylon content. Theresa got some of this too. When I saw hers, I knew I had to have some.

And this. What is the meaning of THIS? You might not be able to see the glitter from where you are. But picture it all glittery. Coz it is. And I think you know what that means in this household:  They're for the glitter-loving daughter. The first sock is more than half done. I cannot express to you sincerely and loudly enough how much I am enjoying the making of these socks and working with this crazy, glittery yarn. I can't stop. This, of course, is a sign of my return to full mental health. (the yarn is Fortissima Colori Disco -- I don't have the ballband right handy, so I can't tell you what color number it is, but it's greys and muted teals)

I found myself on the grounds with no sock needles, even though I had a gorgeous Emergency Sock Kit from Cassie. Well, but it's not really a "kit" until I put stuff in it, right? It's just a case. And I had not put my stuff in it yet. So I made the lame statement, "I don't have any sock needles."  I'm really considering myself quite lucky to still be here with you today. To say that in front of a big bunch of knitters at a fiber festival is really to take a big risk. There was absolutely no sarcasm in their voices when they all screeched nicely reminded me that I could probably find some fucking  needles in the main barn, which was, oh, 25 yards away. So I took the opportunity to buy something I had been wanting to try:  Bryspuns.  Oh, my dear friends. I'm in love with the Bryspuns. LOVE.

While I'm at it, I guess I might as well show you what else I bought.

Beautiful, gorgeous, soft, and scrumptious limited edition Brooks Farm wool, silk, viscose blend. For a nice scarf.

There is also some incredible soap, but I didn't photograph that.  I hope you can deal with your disappointment in not seeing the photo of the soap.

And now, everyone please send all your best vibes to the wonderful Lee Ann.  She is having her surgical consult today.  She is the wonderfully talented maker of M. Lapin.  He is made out of some of her very first handspun -- spindle-spun at that.  And here is some more Monsieur Lapin:

At The Point, NYC.

  Driving to the Fairgrounds

  Waiting patiently.

Comments

[Scout]

I'm sooooo laughing at you calling Dave and doing that.

[Lauren]

You could be a redneck if you kiss your cousin who is also your mom on the mouth. Maybe.

[jackie]

Did you leave any Trekking for the rest of us in the world?? So nice to see you, briefly. I need your address, dear. email me.

[Debi]

Two of my favorite things, Trekking and Bryspuns. Sounds like you had a great time!

[Dave Daniels]

I wish I were there. That sound slike such a fun time.
Of course, imagine if I HAD been there and you made that call.
And, revenge? Oh, you have NO idea. NO idea at all! Bwahahahaha.
Great trip report.

[Cara]

Trouble? Right here in River City? Mwah!!!!!

[gale (she shoots sheep shots)]

Excellent report, almost like being there. Without the farmer's tan. Or the souvenirs...(sigh). Thanks Norma!

[Lolly]

You are all set for this year's Socktoberfest :) You will joining us again, right?
Nice to meet you (ever so briefly!) on Saturday. You got some great goodies.

Best wishes,
Lolly

[Lucia]

All I can say is, you'd better come to Rhinebeck. I couldn't go to MD, nor can I go to NH (Miss B's ballet recital, Sat and Sun both) or MA (weekend escape! for some reason Grant refused to escape to Cummington), but I will so be at Rhinebeck. (I'm going to ME too, but no one goes to ME -- which I actually consider part of its charm, you don't have to buy your Grafton Fiber in the first ten minutes.)

[Elizabeth]

I knew the "please shoot me if you see me buying yarn or spinning fiber" line was just filler in that post a few back. Either that or they checked for weapons at the gate. Nice haul. Did you get the lovely wooden darning thingie you said to someone had to remind you about? I'm really good at that but I just wasn't there,sweetie.

[stephanie]

I'm surprised you weren't punctured to death by all of those knitters whipping out dpns for you when you said you had no needles.
Death by a thousand pokes.

[Paul]

It sounds like a wonderful trip! I'm planning on going to Rhinebeck, and still pondering Mass. But if it's this much fun, I just HAVE to go! Thanks!

[Rachel H]

Your 'daughter' is lovely. You should be very proud. :o)

[MBT]

So sorry I missed you guys, but glad you had such a great time. Not buying fiber - HA! I got so sucked in I almost bought an angora bunny, but good sense prevailed (and the fact that it was a slow check week last week - the joys of freelancing), so I will have to content myself with her photo!

Anyway, 5 short months until Rhinebeck...

[Carole]

I love ALL your stories. And I can hear your laughter in my head!

[Beth S.]

The sight of all that beautiful Trekking lined up in a row is making me a little hot and bothered. Should I be worried?...

And don't get me started on that Brooks Farm stuff.

;-)

[Lee Ann]

Just a little note before I head out (ahem. Sorry. Bad pun): Dulaan's continuation is getting updated in VK! WAHOO! Publicity! Karma! or is it Dharma? I have no freaking clue but I'm thrilled!

[liz]

bitterbitterbitterbitterbitter

[S.Kate]

Sheesh, really do need glasses here... until clicking to reveal M.Lapin's dashing location, I was impressed as all getout and wondering how?/who? took the dangerous looking photo of said bunny purposefully perched atop a festival-bound moving car...

[liz]

But I'm glad you had such a good time!

[jodi]

I kept seeing old men in orange shirts hanging around the entrance to barn 5, and was jokingly telling Hockey Mom that one of them was you and I'd been the victim of some sort of gross internet stalking (the kind where some old dude pretends to be a hot young woman). But when I thought to pull out my camera and get some pics of all the possible Normas, they dispersed. Then you showed up.

[Theresa]

After several years of being enabled, I'm glad I was able to do a little enabling myself. Julie and I are probably going to dye our Cormo sock yarn, too. We're thinking it might be fun to try out making self-striping yarn. Good to see that the sock bug has bitten you now, too! There really is nothing nice than contemplating a drawer of handknit socks in the middle of a cold winter!

[Isela]

I don't know before you bought those Trekking skeins about a shortage but after you got them now there will be a shortage of them...leave some for us, hahahahah. It sounds like you had a great shopping day

[margene]

OOooooo, you know how to have a yarny good time! Trekking colors are soo cool. I have a bunch and have yet to knit with it. Maybe we can do so together.

[Anne]

Oh, comme je suis jalouse... I miss the Point, and Cassie and Cari and other New York wooliness!

[Juno]

I can totally understand why you might make out with Jen in the airport.

And I can't believe I missed the cormo sock yarn. dammit.

Wait, I forgot, I don't knit socks.

You can see how I ended up with so much sock yarn. Note to self: Make a note of this.

How's the sunburn?

[Elisabeth]

I'm so jealous of all of you who went--sounds like it was a blast! Love the sock yarn. Wish I could see the sparkles in the sparkly yarn...

[Jill]

Any relationship doubled scores extra on the redneck scale. I.E. My sister is also my aunt, cousin is my mother, father is my brother. Triple points for each addition title you can add. I once worked with a guy who said his mother was also his sister, aunt and niece. I don't think you want the redneck title that badly...

[Sylvia]

You get more points for blood relations than for marriage, but if they actually went to the hassle of getting hitched that does count toward the total.

My ex and I could go down to the saloon and even when it was packed we'd be related to all but a few visiting Canadians two or three times over. Some of the Canadians were kin, too.

Feuds count also, especially if they have spanned so many generations that the original conflict is hearsay. A marriage between feuding clans triples its value.

Which emergency sock kit did you get? What are you going to stow in it?

[Your Knitting Tea Swap Pal]

Wow - all this fun and it's not even *The Festival Not To Be Missed*!!! Wow. How fun will Rhinebeck be? I really must get to one of these festivals with a lot of money in my pocket. Thanks for the photos and stories!

[Imbrium]

So...did you get a wooden darning egg?

[Helen]

Oh wow! That sounds like so much fun! I keep repeating to myself; maybe one day....maybe one day...

[Wanda]

Umm, did you get enough Trekking? You know, you only need 1 skein for a pair of socks, right? :-) j/k I want some of the color 100, such a pretty color. Hopefully my LYS will be getting it in soon. Glad you had such a great time at MDS&W!

[ann]

did you not get my request to kiss Cara too? and slip her some tongue??? man, she is gonna be pissed.

[Silvia]

Like the guy at LaGuardia has never seen something "that" shocking. AS IF!

So good to see you and hang for a bit. I've got pix that will eventually get uploaded so I'll let you know.

[aubree]

if you're going to go to the dark side, it might as well be with trekking. I *love* those colors--so jealous!

[rock chick]

Yep, the "I'm only buying a darning egg" was dead in the water by the time we hit Brooks Farm. First, Norma, next, Claudia...mwahahahahahaha!!!!!

[Kristen]

Drool. Drool, drool, drool! Next year! (Hopefully.)

[Cookie]

I am so glad you had a good time. I'm sure I'll stop being jealous and bitter sooner or later...

[Laurie]

Vixen. Making out with girls with orange and pink hair. I would have given my first up at the gate (okay, 150th) for a picture of that.

Nice haul! I can't believe I missed the Cormo sock yarn. I was glazed by the time I got to their booth, and only got a small bit of roving.

[Tee]

This explains why, despite thinking Treking came in pretty colors, I could only find a red/purple combo... and black. Really. Black. And now I know who got to the pretty colors before I did...

[--Deb]

Oh, you had FUN!! I'm so glad!

[lynne s of oz]

yarn pictures! SEX! Thank heavens I got some somewhere! People have been holding out on me but you've come through for me, Norma!

[emily]

Aaaarg! Stop it! Oh, the jealousy! Next year I am SO GOING to MDSW even if I have to sell all my stash yarn to get there!

[Dagny]

Um, hate to tell you, but the Fiber Frolic in Maine IS worth the drive, and while we're no MS&W there are plenty of people who come each year! Yes it may be small, but who else has the Llama Drill Team? And of course, we'll be there, we have 2 booths this year - look for the spinning 13 year old boy and his harassed looking mom :)

Oh and Norma? Best see what showed up in the paper after you left Cara, she so kindly posted it on her blog...

[Kathy]

DAMN that sounds like fun! Can I borrow your life for a wee little bit?